my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
