If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
