why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize