I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
