I wannas sexs uuuuu
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
