question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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