break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
