Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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