so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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