I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize