let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
