apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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