I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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