Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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