she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
