thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
