i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
