I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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