Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
