Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Still dying that you shit outside
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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