There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
