You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
They have beer where we have blood.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
