I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
