I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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