Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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