Dual....:-)
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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