oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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