Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
