Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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