If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
