whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
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