You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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