when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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