y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
