he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
pop tarts are not kleenex
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
