brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
