I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize