you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
