): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
