once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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