Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
