Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
