I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
