so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I came so hard my ears popped.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
