Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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