the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
