Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
birth control should be required to get into college
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
