You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
