so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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