he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
