I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize