We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
